[Two guys are fighting in his house, making a mess] Bogey Lowenstien: You guys, please! Take it outside! [They smash through a window] Bogey Lowenstien: Thank y
Kat Stratford: [drunk. Leans in close to Patrick] Hey... your eyes have a little green in them. [Patrick smiles momentarily, then Kat vomits at his feet
Cameron: I burn, I pine, I perish. [Lucentio's line from The Taming of the Shrew Act I Scene 1] Michael: Of course you do. You know, she's beautiful and deep, I'm sur
Kat Stratford: Oh wait... was that... did your hairline just recede?
Bogey Lowenstien: [the doorbell rings] That must be Nigel with the brie.
Michael: [about Bianca] What's there is a snotty little princess wearing a strategically planned sundress to make guys like us realize we can never touch her, and guys like, uh, Joey realize they want to. She, my friend, is what we will spend the rest of our lives not having, Put her in your "Span
Joey: [holding up headshots] Which one do you like better? Bianca: Umm, I think I like the white shirt better. Joey: Yeah, it's-it's more... Bianca: Pensive? Joey: Damn, I was going for thought
Joey: Are you lost? Michael: No, actually I just came by to chat. Joey: We don't cha
Walter Stratford: I'm down, I've got the 411, and you are not going out and getting jiggy with some boy, I don't care how dope his ride is. My momma didn't raise no foo'!
Patrick: So what's your excuse? Kat Stratford: For? Patrick: Acting the way we do. Kat Stratford: I don't like to do what people expect.Why should I live up to other people's expectations instead of my own? Patrick: So you disappoint them from the start and then you're covered, right? Kat Stratfor
Patrick: Hey there girly. How you doin'? Kat Stratford: Sweating like a pig actually and yourself? Patrick: Now there's a way to get a guy's attention huh? Kat Stratford: My mission in life. But, obviously I struck your fancy so you see it worked. The world makes sense aga
Walter Stratford: What are the two house rules? Number One: No dating till you graduate. Number Two: No dating till you graduate.
Ms. Perky: People perceive you as somewhat... Kat Stratford: Tempestuous? Ms. Perky: "Heinous bitch" is the term used most ofte
[both speaking french] Cameron: May I offer you a parsnip? Bianca: No, you may not. Cameron: Where is my uncle's pencil? Bianca: I don't know. Maybe it is up your
Michael: These delusionals are your White Rastas. Uh, they're big Marley fans, they think they're black, semi-political, but mostly... Cameron: Smoke a lot of weed
Walter Stratford: I know who you wanna bend the rules for. It's that hot-rod Joey. Bianca: What's a hot-rod
[after purposefully crashing into a car] Kat Stratford: Whoops
Kat Stratford: You are amazingly self-assured, has anyone ever told you that? Patrick: I tell myself that every day, actually
Bianca: You suck! Kat Stratford: [Mocking Bianca] You suck
Kat Stratford: You're not surrounded by your usual cloud of smoke. Patrick: I know, I quit. Apparently they're bad for you. Kat Stratford: You thin
Walter Stratford: This morning, I delivered a set of twins to a fifteen-year-old girl, do you know what she said to me? Bianca: "I'm a crack-whore who should have made my skeazy boyfriend wear a condom"? Walter Stratford: Close, but no. She said, "I should have listened to my father". Bianca: She
Kat Stratford: What is it, Asshole Day?
Kat Stratford: Have you seen the unwashed miscreants that go to that school?
Cameron: And I'm BACK IN THE GAME!
Patrick: I thought for sure I was busted when I was climbing out that window, I tell you. So, how did you keep him distracted? Kat Stratford: I dazzled him with my... wits
Patrick: And I didn't sleep with a Spice Girl... I think.
[talking about the prom] Kat Stratford: Can you even imagine? Who the hell would go to that antiquated mating-ritual? Mandella: I would, but I don't have a date. Kat Stratford: Do you really wanna get all dressed up, so some Drakkar Noir-wearing dexter with a boner can feel you up while you're for
Cameron: She never wanted me. She wanted Joey the whole time. Patrick: Cameron, do you like the girl? Cameron: Yeah. Patrick: Yeah, and is she worth all this trouble? Cameron: Well, I thought she was, but you know, I... Patrick: Well, she is or she isn't. See first of all, Joey is not half the man
Patrick: What is it with this chick, she have beer flavored nipples? Cameron: Hey
Michael: The shit hath hitith the fan... ith.