Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn't done it. Evan
The only thing worse than being on the wrong side of an argument is to be on the right side with no one listening.
It takes far more courage to violate a custom than a law.
Don't tear your hair out over a woman; it'll be harder to attract the next one if you're bald.
Play: Work that you enjoy doing for nothing
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy - and Jill a rich widow
Hope is tomorrow's veneer over today's disappointment. Evan
The survival of the fittest is going to make some man very lonesome some day.
Some women get divorces on the grounds of incompatibility; others, on just the first two syllables.
A word to the wise is -- unnecessary.
An expert is someone who takes something you already know and makes it sound confusing.
The best way to make a long story short is to stop listening.
A man picks a wife about the same way an apple picks a farmer.
Charm is to a woman what perfume is to a flower.
Women diet to retain their girlish figures or their boyish husbands.
Hope is tomorrow's veneer over today's disappointment. Evan Esa
The Lord takes care of his own, but church trustees still put lightning rods on the steeple.
The three chief causes of divorce are men, women, and marriage.
If you want to be successful, you must either have a chance or take one.
The first requisite for a good cup of coffee in the morning is to get your wife out of bed.
The chief ability of an executive should be his ability to recognize ability.
The only way to cure an egotist from bragging is by surgery--amputation at the neck.
It's surprising how much wisdom every man possesses -- if not for his own affairs, then for the affairs of others.
A husband may forget where he went on his honeymoon, but he never forgets why.
The man who avoids debt doesn't have to worry about avoiding his creditors.
The word impossible is peculiar because if you examine it closely, you'll find that most of it is possible.
Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.
[A mathematician is a] scientist who can figure out anything except such simple things as squaring the circle and trisecting an angle.
A signature always reveals a man's character - and sometimes even his name.
Only one man has the right to boast, and that's the man who never does.