There is no character, howsoever good and fine, but it can be destroyed by ridicule, howsoever poor and witless.
But it is a blessed provision of nature that at times like these, as soon as a man's mercury has got down to a certain point there comes a revulsion, and he rallies. Hope springs up, and cheerfulness along with it, and then he is in good shape to do something for himself, if anything can be done.
It's lovely to live on a raft. We had the sky up there, all speckled with stars, and we used to lay on our backs and look up at them, and discuss about whether they was made or only just happened.
The first time a student realizes that a little learning is a dangerous thing is when he brings home a poor report card.
The reason most people don't go to church is because they've already been.
Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.
Familiarity breeds contempt - and children. Mark Twai
The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are in the wrong. Nearly anybody will side with you when you are in the right.
[On Dutch flat poetry]: It is too smooth and blubbery; it reads like butter-milk gurgling from a jug.
The Bible is full of interest. It has noble poetry in it; and some clever fables; and some blood-drenched history; and some good morals; and a wealth of obscenity; and upwards of a thousand lies. This Bible is built mainly out of fragments of older Bibles that had their day and crumbled to ruin. So
I do not wish any reward but to know I have done the right thing.
Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.
If it's your job to eat a frog, it's best to do it first thing in the morning. And If it's your job to eat two frogs, it's best to eat the biggest one first.
A distinguished man should be as particular about his last words as he is about his last breath. He should write them out on a slip of paper and take the judgment of his friends on them. He should never leave such a thing to the last hour of his life, and trust to an intellectual spurt at the last m
The calamity that comes is never the one we had prepared ourselves for.
You have heretofore found out, by my teachings, that man is a fool; you are now aware that woman is a damned fool.
When in doubt tell the truth.
Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from making bad decisions.
What ought to be done to the man who invented the celebrating of anniversaries? Mere killing would be too light.
The citizen who sees his society's democratic clothes being worn out and does not cry it out, is not a patriot, but a traitor.
No sinner is ever saved after the first twenty minutes of a sermon.
It is governed by minorities, seldom or never by majorities. It suppresses its feelings and its beliefs and follows the handful that makes the most noise. Sometimes the noisy handful is right, sometimes wrong, but no matter, the crowd follows it.
When the time comes that a man has had his dinner, then the true man comes to the surface
Do not undervalue the headache. While it is at its sharpest it seems a bad investment; but when relief begins, the unexpired remainder is worth $4 a minute.
George Washington, as a boy, was ignorant of the commonest accomplishments of youth. He could not even lie.
The election makes me think of a story of a man who was dying. He had only two minutes to live, so he sent for a clergyman and asked him, "Where is the best place to go to?" He was undecided about it. So the minister told him that each place had its advantages--heaven for climate, and hell for socie
Is a person's public and private opinion the same? It is thought there have been instances.
The source of all humor is not laughter, but sorrow.
To lodge all power in one party and keep it there is to insure bad government and the sure and gradual deterioration of the public morals.
The humorous story is told gravely; the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it.