July 4. Statistics show that we lose more fools on this day than in all the other days of the year put together. This proves, by the number left in stock, that one fourth of July per year is now inadequate, the country has grown so

-Mark Twain
Mark Twain

Experience comes from bad judgment.

Mark Twain
Concentration of power in a political machine is bad; and an Established Church is only a political machine; it was invented for that; it is nursed, cradled, preserved for that; it is an enemy to human liberty, and does no good which it could not better do in a split-up and scattered condition.
Mark Twain

A man may have no bad habits and have worse

Mark Twain
What work I have done I have done because it has been play. If it had been work I shouldn't have done it. . . . The work that is really a man's own work is play and not work at all. . . . When we talk about the great workers of the world we really mean the great players of the world.
Mark Twain

But they (the infantry) had no use for boys of twelve and thirteen, and before I had a chance in another war, the desire to kill people to whom I had not been introduced had passed away.

Mark Twain
If you can't stand solitude, perhaps others find you boring as well.
Mark Twain

Some people get an education without going to college. The rest get it after they get out.

Mark Twain
It is a good thing to write for the amusement of the public, but it is a far higher and nobler thing to write for their instruction, their profit, their actual and tangible benefit.
Mark Twain

Our lives, our liberty, and our property are never in greater danger than when Congress is in session.

Mark Twain
I knew a man who grabbed a cat by the tail and learned forty percent more about cats than the man who didn't.