The older I get, the more clearly I remember things that never happened.
My heart goes out to anyone who is making his first appearance before an audience of human beings.
Better a broken promise than none at all.
What do we call love, hate, charity, revenge, humanity, forgiveness? Different results of the master impulse, the necessity of securing one's self-approval.
That's just the way: a person does a low-down thing, and then he don't want to take no consequences of it. Thinks as long as he can hide it, it ain't no disgrace.
Life should begin with age and it's privileges and accumulations, and end with youth and it's capacity to splendidly enjoy such advantages.
You can't keep a juvenile moral institution alive on two displays of its sash per year.
There are no accidents, all things have a deep and calculated purpose; sometimes the methods employed by Providence seem strange and incongruous, but we have only to be patient and wait for the result: then we recognize that no others would have answered the purpose, and we are rebuked and humbled.
In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards. Mark Twai
All emotion is involuntary when genuine. Mark Twai
When you catch an adjective, kill it. No, I don't mean utterly, but kill most of them--then the rest will be valuable. They weaken when they are close together. They give strength when they are far apart.
You need not expect to get your book right the first time. Go to work and revamp or rewrite it. God only exhibits his thunder and lightning at intervals, and so they always command attention. These are God's adjectives. You thunder and lightning too much; the reader ceases to get under the bed, by a
How lovely is death; and how niggardly it is doled out.
A man who is not born with the novel-writing gift has a troublesome time of it when he tries to build a novel. I know this from experience. He has no clear idea of his story; in fact he has no story. He merely has some people in his mind, and an incident or two, also a locality, and he trusts he can
There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is cowardice. Mark Twai
Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life. Mark T
India is, the cradle of the human race, the birthplace of human speech, the mother of history, the grandmother of legend, and the great grand mother of tradition. our most valuable and most instructive materials in the history of man are treasured up in India only.
God could create the world in six days because he didn't have to make it compatible with the previous version.Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company
The first half of life consists of the capacity to enjoy with the chance; the last half consists of the chance without the capacity.
The spirit of Christianity proclaims the brotherhood of the race and the meaning of that strong word has not been left to guesswork, but made tremendously definite - the Christian must forgive his brother man all crimes he can imagine and commit, and all insults he can conceive and utter - forgive t
I came in with Halley's Comet in 1835. It is coming again next year, and I expect to go out with it. It will be the greatest disappointment of my life if I don't go out with Halley's Comet. The Almighty has said, no doubt: "Now here are these two unaccountable freaks; they came in together, they mus
One should never use exclamation points in writing. It is like laughing at your own joke.
And I urge upon you this - which I think is wisdom - if you find you can't make seventy by any but an uncomfortable road, don't you go.
What's your name?" "Becky Thatcher. What's yours? Oh, I know. It's Thomas Sawyer." "That's the name they lick me by. I'm Tom when I'm good. You call me Tom, will you?" "Yes
I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.
There are two types of speakers: those that are nervous and those that are liars.
Man seems to be a rickety poor sort of thing, any way you take him; a kind of British Museum of infirmities and inferiorities. He is always undergoing repairs. A machine that was as unreliable as he is would have no market.
Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul. Mark Twai
Conscience, man's moral medicine chest.
I've never let my school interfere with my education.